Sunday, February 18, 2018

Baxter Black: Advice Column

As a fellow veterinarian, I am hoping you can help me. My wife Nancy has two cow dogs that will readily obey commands to sit and stay until they get near a cow. Then they chase the critter and can't hear a word we say. It's very obvious to me that they go deaf near livestock.
So, what's your diagnosis? I've considered cow dander allergies, pour on irritation and ear infections to name a few. If possible, send a note or RX.
Signed Anxious in Tie Siding, Dr. L.W.
Dear L.W.
I am pleased to inform you that your wife's two cow dogs are suffering from a malady that is common in Blue Heelers. It also occurs in species further down the food chain such as backyard horses, bird dogs and teenagers.
Your suggested diagnosis associates their problems to the nearness of cattle. However, research at the NASA Cow Dog behavioral Institute in Homer City, PA indicated a relationship more closely related to the proximity of the dominant figure. i.e., the greater the distance between master and dog, the less your influence.
The technical name for the syndrome is called Progressive Dumb Dog Detachment Amnesia or PDA. There are some social scientists who believe PDA is a result of a broken home, a puppyhood trauma or sucking hind tit. Others, with only a Master's Degree prefer to think it is a biological defect like damaged chromosomes, lack of a braun or too much Co-op dog food.

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